Smith recalls the trip to David Letterman on the most recent episode of My Next Guest Needs No Introduction, seeing all of his money, home, and job rising further and further away from him.
The Oscar winner admitted to taking hallucinogenic tea 14 times in two years.
“Once you drink it you’re going to see yourself in a way you’ve never seen yourself,” he said. “One of the experiences was the individual most hellish psychological experience of my life.”
Smith continued: “I drank, and it usually takes about 45 minutes to kick in. And I’m sitting there and you always feel like, ‘Maybe it won’t kick in this time.’ So I’m drinking and sitting there and then all of a sudden it’s like I start seeing all of my money flying away, and my house is flying away and my career is going away.”
In a panic, the King Richard actor says he began to try to “grab” his belongings.
“My whole life is getting destroyed,” he said. “This is my fear in real life, and I’m in there and I’m wanting to vomit and all of that, and I hear a voice saying: ‘This is what the f— it is. This is what the f— life is.’”
He then describes seeing his daughter Willow cry for help.
“Then slowly I stopped caring about my money, I just wanted to get to Willow. I stopped caring about my house, I stopped caring about my career,” he shared with Letterman.
Smith recalls the epiphany moment that came over him once the worst of it was passed. He came from his trip with a new view of life.
“When I came out of it, I realized that anything that happens in my life, I can handle it,” the 53-year-old actor said. “I can handle any person I lose, I can handle anything that goes wrong in my life, I can handle anything in my marriage. I can handle anything that this life has to offer me.”